


After The Storm

by Kimmimaru



Category: Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Father-Son Relationship, M/M, Mentions of Suicide, Past Character Death, Suicidal Thoughts, Tseng/Aerith one sided pining, mentions of Aerith
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-21
Updated: 2016-10-21
Packaged: 2018-08-23 18:58:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8339008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kimmimaru/pseuds/Kimmimaru
Summary: Reno twists his head around, looking up into Rude's face so he sees the frantic gleam in his eye. His expression reflects what they're all feeling; fear of an uncertain future, loss, pain. It's all exposed in Reno's face, in his eyes as he searches Rude for some kind of sign that everything's going to be ok. That there's some hope for a bunch of murderers in a world where their skills won't be needed; a world of peace is no place for men of violence.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is an angst filled fic because I'm a bitch and my fave characters are not allowed to be happy. Lol. There's mentions of stuff from Before Crisis and 'On The Way To A Smile; Case of ShinRa' as well as 'The Kids Are Alright' Novella and the usual OG/CC. Basically it's as canon as I can possibly make it, not being a creator and all. It's set between the end of the OG and AC, so the world's still in shock over the near-ending of the planet. Basically after Rufus is rescued by Reno and Rude from the remains of ShinRa tower he's kidnapped by some nut case called 'Muten' and tortured, then he's kidnapped by a mental doctor Kilmister. This doctor is insane and keeps a bunch of people with the stigma in some kind of cave-thing that eventually floods. A lot of sentient (yes, its Sephiroth...because he comes in a liquid too now. Liquid Sephiroth.) black water gets into Rufus' mouth (Rufus ingests liquid Sephiroth, that cannot be healthy) and that is what gives him the Stigma. The Turks eventually find him and rescue him. If you haven't read these things GO READ (It's all on Lifestream.net)! They're fascinating. It gives you a real insight into the Turks and Rufus' thoughts. I love it. (Also, the above description is just my very sketchy summary, don't assume that the novella's are anything like that. They're so much better and obviously I've probably got stuff wrong so don't quote me on it. I haven't read it in a while) So yeah...I hope you all enjoy.

It's one of those moments, the quiet after the storm. Rufus is finally back with them, sequestered away from harm at Healen Lodge. Reno stands at the top of the stairs, gazing out over the lush valley, the atmosphere is humid, the distant sounds of rushing water fill the air. Insects purr in the tall grass and even from their elevated position they can hear them, hidden deep in the woods and grasses. The sun is low on the horizon, gleaming golden and orange and red as fiery as Reno's hair. It's long now, reaching past his shoulders and it's in bad condition. The ends are breaking, it's dry but somehow as Rude's fingers thread into it, it's still soft. Reno lets out a quiet breath, shoulders sagging as Rude moves closer against his back. “It's...quiet, yo.” He whispers, voice hoarse as the sun sinks below the line of mountains around them. Somewhere far off a chocobo warks. “We been here...how long...?”

“A month.”

“A month? Shit. Feels like years.”

Rude doesn't respond, it does feel so much longer since they had found Rufus half-drowned under the dubious 'care' of a mad doctor. They lost him enough times already, Tseng's not going to allow it to happen again. Reno shifts as Rude's fingers curl into his pony tail, he can feel a ripple of tension go through him before he takes a small breath and lets it out again. Reno's weight moves to his other hip but he doesn't tell Rude to get off. “I hate it.” Reno mutters, shoulders rising to his ears. The sun finally sinks below the mountains, casting them in shadows. The wind is cool as it tugs at Reno's hair and jacket, causing him to shiver and lean back into the warmth of his partners body. “I hate this...this...waitin'.” He finishes finally, shuddering and breathing again. Rude feels it too, the tension, the indecisiveness. It's painful. They're not used to being stationary, being stuck in the same location for more than two weeks at a time. There's no more jobs now, there's no more orders while Rufus is recovering from his recent escapades. Reno's hands slide from his pockets and his fingers curl around the bannister as he gazes down into the darkening valley as if contemplating throwing himself off. Rude holds the tops of his arms, anchoring him. A solid, heavy presence at his back that brings him careening back away from the edge of whatever dark thoughts were passing through his head. “A month. Four whole fuckin' weeks.” Reno whispers, “No orders. No nothin'. Rufus is...” He trails off, shaking his head and sighing as his eyes snap shut. “ShinRa...it's...gone...ain't it? Withou' Rufus...we're jus' kinda floatin' around. What...what're we supposed ta do now? What're we supposed ta be thinkin'?”

“We do the job, when it comes.” Reno says but even as the words leave his lips he's not entirely sure what they mean anymore. Reno chokes out a laugh, it's harsh in the cooling evening and the sound of his jacket as he shifts again restlessly is over-loud. 

“I don' know wha' ta do withou' ShinRa.” Reno shudders, head lowering as he hides from the fear that is prominent in all of them. Elena is less affected, a newbie still even through the trials she's suffered already. She's got a life to go back to if she wants it, she has the potential to leave. Rude looks over the top of Reno's head and sees the stars begin to appear. “Hey, partner?”

“Hm?”

“If Rufus dies, yo...I wan' ya ta put a bullet through my head.” Reno's words are quiet but there's an edge to them that tells Rude he's perfectly serious. His large hands spread slowly as they trail down Reno's tense shoulders to his hips, his fingers feel too big, too strong for something as fragile as Reno's body. He tenses, bowing his head, suddenly glad that Reno's got his back to him so he doesn't see the agony in his expression.

“He ain't gunna die-”

“If he does, though.” Reno interrupts, his own hands moving to Rude's and resting there. Rude can feel them shake. “If...if it's really the end o' ShinRa...I...I can' live. Sounds melodramatic.” He snorts humourlessly, “Bu' ya know I was raised by 'em...ya know I ain't got no one else. Dragged up from the slums an' shoved inta trainin'...I was a kid, yo. I din' have no one. Veld an' Tseng was my on'y family.” Reno smiles into the darkness, a soft smile, one no one ever, ever sees. “I been a Turk for most o' my life. There ain't nothin' else...for me...I ain't got no other purpose. I's no' like I wanna die, I jus'...don' wanna live in a world tha' don' need scum like me.”

Rude thinks back to the Mythril mines, his hands, smaller than they are now but still large for a kid, breaking rocks. He remembers the darkness, it's why he wears his glasses all the time, he can't stand light, it gives him migraines. He remembers his father's huge arms, lifting him easily into the air, the panicked edge to his voice as they ran full pelt through the deep, dark tunnels. He remembers the sudden feeling of weightlessness as he was tossed through the opening of the mine-shaft and caught by one of his father's friends before the entire system collapsed on top of him. Rude doesn't remember much after that, for years he went from job to job, travelling the world over in search of money and food and shelter. That was until he finally reached Midgar, the fabled city of dreams. His strength had earned him immediate attention, he was dragged into illegal fighting rings at the age of fifteen and two years later finally noticed by a man in a sharp suit, neat beard and a prominent scar running down one cheek. That man had given him an offer, something that, in the end, he couldn't refuse. Money, permanent accommodation and a secure life all for the price of his soul. It was an easy bargain for a seventeen year old with no family, to make. 

His grip tightens on Reno, fingers digging deep enough to bruise. He pushes close, pressing him against the bannister and feels his breath hitch. He presses his face into the crook of Reno's throat and lets out a shaky breath of his own. “You ain't going without me, partner.” He mutters into his skin, tasting salt and soap and terror. “I won't let you go alone.”

Reno rests back against him, his breath leaving him in a rush. His limbs turn liquid, his body moulding into Rude's as if he'd been made to fit there. They close their eyes, the wind picking up and throwing Reno's hair into Rude's face. “We'll go out with a bang, partner.” Reno sighs, smiling a little as he feels Rude's body against his. It's familiar, it's comforting. 

“We're in this together, yeah?”

“Mm, yeah. Together.” Reno twists his head around, looking up into Rude's face so he sees the frantic gleam in his eye. His expression reflects what they're all feeling; fear of an uncertain future, loss, pain. It's all exposed in Reno's face, in his eyes as he searches Rude for some kind of sign that everything's going to be ok. That there's some hope for a bunch of murderers in a world where their skills won't be needed; a world of peace is no place for men of violence.

Rude is about to lean down and capture Reno's lips with his own but before he can the door opens behind them, Reno tenses in his arms and steps away. The cold wind fills the space he leaves behind and Rude finds himself shivering. He turns and follows Reno's gaze as Tseng steps out of the lodge and into the moonlight. His face is grey, eyes dark and full of shadows. He joins them at the railing and looks over the sleeping valley, long fingers curling around the freezing cold wood. “The doctor's just left.” He says quietly, letting out a soft breath as he hangs his head. “The injuries he sustained during his imprisonment have healed fine.” 

Reno tenses and Rude shifts, adjusting his collar to keep out the bite of the wind. “But...?” Reno pushes, moving closer to Tseng's side. 

“Rufus...” Tseng swallows and a small, humourless smile graces his elegant features. “He contracted the Stigma.”

Reno curses so loudly it echoes down the valley, he turns away and scrapes both hands through his hair. His eyes narrowing into dangerous slits as he stares back at the lodge. Rude feels a horrible sinking sensation deep in his gut, “So...what does this mean for us?” He asks hesitantly, shifting from one foot to the other.

Tseng licks his lips, he looks beyond exhausted. He looks half-dead already. “I can only speak for myself but I have every intention of seeing the President through this.” He takes a breath and lets it out again slowly before adjusting his jacket and brushing specks of invisible dust from his shoulder. “Our job is to protect him and now, more than ever, he needs us by his side. What you do is your own choice, you are no longer bound by the old order.”

Reno shudders, bending over and bracing himself on the railings, “...i's like there's a hole under my feet an' I can feel i' suckin' me in, yo.” His voice cracks and he bends his head so his hair falls over his shoulder. He's crumbling, falling to pieces like the ShinRa building. Rude wonders, briefly, if killing him would be a mercy at this point. Their entire lives have shattered into thousands of tiny splinters, it's falling apart and nothing can stop it. “Shit!” Reno slams his fist against the wood, there's a pained yelp as he pulls his arm against his chest and Rude knows he's broken something. The bannister has cracked down the middle. Tseng moves forward silently, his hand already glowing as he grabs Reno's wrist and pulls his hand forward. Reno tries to retract it but Tseng's grip is too strong. The cure washes over him and he sighs, eyes closing.

“Materia is in short supply. I had Elena document whatever it is we do have and it's...bad.” He pauses and sighs, releasing Reno and returning to his vigil over the jagged rocks and lush trees. “There's no cure for the Stigma.” 

“We know.” Reno mutters weakly. “ShinRa's...really fucked now, huh?”

“Perhaps.” Tseng's voice tightens momentarily but it's the only sign of weakness they get from him as he leans casually against the railings, elbows holding his weight and hands clasped neatly. “What will you do, if the president dies?” He asks, perhaps coldly, but Tseng's not one to mince his words.

Reno laughs bitterly, throwing his head back and looking to the stars. He pauses for a second before reaching into his jacket and withdrawing a small box, he opens it and lifts it up for Tseng and Rude to see. Inside is a bullet. Reno's hand shakes a little and meets their eyes one after the other. “This was from the firs' gun I ever fired.” He says, a tiny smile lingering on his lips but it's a mockery of his normal one. “I kept one back, ya'know, just in case someone decided ta end my contract.” He snaps the box shut and tucks it back inside his jacket before leaning back against the railing again. His meaning is very clear, Rude feels an uncomfortable sensation deep in his gut. He imagines Reno's blood and brain matter splattered against a wall and it makes him sick. He turns away, his silence all the answer Reno needs to know how he feels about it.

Tseng moves his hair back over one shoulder absently, a small, humourless smile playing around his mouth. “Elena will go back to her sister. I'll make certain of that, I don't think Emma would ever forgive me if I allowed her to get dragged down with us.” His jacket shifts enough so that they can see the outline of his gun holstered at his side. “It's an easy choice for us to make, we have no living family.”

“We are each other's family.” Rude says into the pause. Reno looks at him, eyes sharp and bright, almost enough to cut Rude to ribbons if he were man enough to meet his gaze.

“Elena's still an innocent, despite what she says.” Tseng sighs. “She can move on, live a normal life.”

“Normal? What the fuck's tha'?” Reno snorts, looking away, down at his boots. “I never knew normal, yo.”

“None of us have.” Tseng tilts his head,the moonlight giving his skin a weird glow. 

“Rufus isn't dead yet.” Rude says, unable to cope with the conversation any longer. “We'll keep him that way, even if it kills us.” He looks from Tseng to Reno and back again. “It's our job.”

“He saved our lives, yo.” Reno mutters, pushing his hands back into his pockets. “Do ya remember?” He lifts his head and looks at Rude, then to Tseng. “We were gunna be executed. Scarlet would'a loved tha'...glad the bitch is dead.” A flash of a smile crosses his face but it's quickly replaced by a more serious expression again. 

“Hm. I'll never forget.” Tseng sighs. “Veld...”

“Would've wanted us to get the job done.” Rude finishes for him, hands folding in his lap easily. “He always said it, told us to get it done no matter what. We'll do it. We'll find a cure.”

“Where?! There's no fuckin' cure, man! The planet...it's fuckin' angry! Can' ya feel it? It's pissed an' it's gettin' it's revenge! An' ya know wha'? We're the ones ta blame. We did this!” He waves his hands to encompass the entire planet, eyes narrowed with anger and self-hatred. He begins to pace, unable to keep his emotions bottled up any longer. “We fucked up. It's our fault. Me, you, you an' Rufus fuckin' ShinRa! We're doomed an' we deserve it! This...this is punishment...divine if ya wanna think like tha'. We gave ShinRa the tools ta make a monster, we helped it drink up the lifestream like I' was juice. We enabled all this...it's our fault.” He takes a sudden, shuddering breath and crumples again, like wet origami. He falls to his ass on the wooden platform and puts his head in his shaking hands. “We killed so...so many fuckin' people...” He whispers, voice ripped away by the wind.

Rude looks up at the moon, a perfect bright orb hanging in a sea of stars as bright as materia. He moves the two paces to Reno's side and sinks to the floor, knees cracking as he does so. He's getting old.

“Yes, you're right.” Tseng says, touching his chest, the place Sephiroth's blade had sliced into him. The wound that had nearly killed him. He closes his eyes, head low and silken hair sliding to obscure his face. “We support a company who almost caused Armageddon.” He pauses again, almost hearing soft laughter, almost able to smell the scent of her flowers on the wind. “But...perhaps...if your Goddess deems us worthy, we can try to make amends.” He looks up, seeing the moon and wondering if it still looked the same from Wutai. His home country that he hasn't seen for too many years. “Atonement. It's a good goal, don't you think?”

Reno slowly lifts his head, blinking at the sight of Tseng at the railings. “Atonement?” He breathes, looking back down at his hands. He sees the metaphorical blood caking them and licks his lips, curling them into fists. “Atonement.” He repeats, as if in a daze. “Do ya think...do ya think it's even possible to atone for what we did?”

Tseng's head tilts and he casts a small smile on Reno and Rude, “One would hope so or the entire human race is doomed.”

Rude nods slowly, a picture beginning to form in his head. An image of hope. Of a life beyond the ShinRa of old.

“The president wishes to attempt to atone for the sins he has committed. I believe that it's a worthy sentiment...if nothing else, it's a reason for living.” Tseng's eyes are brighter than they have been for a very long time, his smile seems strange on his face and it makes him look young again.

“A...new ShinRa. A better ShinRa.” Reno whispers, awe obvious in his voice now as his eyes widen and brighten, energy slowly returning to him after months of tension and heartache. “Yeah...yeah I think I can get behind tha', yo.” And then it's there, that smile. That beautiful grin, lighting up his face and reminding Rude that he's only twenty-six, still a kid by his and Tseng's standards. He stands up and turns to the valley, smiling as he digs into his pocket once again. He takes out the box with his death inside it and then draws his arm back, with one fluid movement he tosses it out over the rocks and water and trees and all three of them watch it fall into the darkness. “Tha's it, I'm gunna do everythin' in my power ta make ShinRa better. I'm gunna help Rufus ta move on an' make up for what we done, yo. Whaddya say?” He turns on Rude, still grinning that beautiful grin. 

Rude can't help it, he moves before considering what he's doing, his hands slide around Reno, one hand at the back of his neck, the other at his waist. He tilts Reno's head, guiding him by his pony tail and captures his mouth with his own. Reno tenses for a second before melting into the kiss, his own hands rising to grasp at Rude's head and shoulder. They kiss slowly, tongues dancing, feeling each other out and reacquainting themselves with each others mouths. 

Tseng smiles to himself, his job done. Slowly he turns and goes back into Healen Lodge, their home. He returns to Rufus' side and sits by his bed. He's asleep for now, his face peaceful in his drug-induced dreams. Tseng reaches out, placing a hand on the boys brow, his touch is tentative, never something he would ever do if anyone was watching. He brushes a lock of brilliant blond hair from his head, seeing the bandages covering his broken skin. “You'll get better, sir. I promise.” He murmurs in his native tongue and sees the tiny frown lines on Rufus' face relax at the sound of his voice.

“Ts-Tseng...” Rufus sighs, voice slurred and thick.

Tseng smiles like a father with his son, he sits back in his seat and produces a battered glass box from beneath his chair. He takes it out and opens it, revealing a thick stack of letters. His face falls a little as he brings one envelope to his lips and closes his eyes. He can smell her on them still, the hand cream she started using after her nineteenth birthday. Her hands had always gotten so dry from grubbing around in dirt all day long, Tseng had given her a pot of his mother's favourite scent for her birthday. He hadn't had the courage to hand it to her in person, so he had left it for her on her doorstep. Somehow she had known and thanked him the very next day, much to his embarrassment. His love for her had been growing and changing for years but that day he was no longer able to ignore it. He puts the letter back and finds an open one, on the front is not Zack's name but his. It is written on pink paper with decorative flowers all over it. He re-reads it, it's well worn at the edges from the number of times he's gone over it already. The handwriting sends familiar pain rolling over him and he lowers his head, a single dried white flower slides from between the pages and falls to the floor silently. 

He can still hear her voice, her laughter, see her bright, smiling eyes. It tore him to shreds every single time. The letter flutters to the floor along with the flower, the pages lay scattered under the chair as exhaustion catches up with him. His eyes drift closed, his head falling back against the seat. As he drifts through the fog of sleep he hears her again, one last time;

I forgive you.


End file.
